30 Dec 05 Bandwagon.

Everyone else did one, so here's me in Yahoos! eyes.

It's fairly accurate I think.

~F

30 Dec 05 What a Week I'm Havin'.

What a busy, crazy, and exhausting week it's been. Let's do a quick bulleted recap shall we.

The Week in Review

• Friday
  B&N: 11AM - 7PM
  BankFirst: 7:15PM - 3:30AM, also went out for a bit finally getting to bed at around 4:15AM

• Saturday
  B&N: 8:30AM - 4PM
  Then to the coast to spend time with my brother and Willie Nelson dad and watch kids open presents. Stayed up drinking with bro' and pops and putting Christmas gifts together until 2AM.

• Sunday
  Up at 7:15AM for more in-laws Christmas presents, then to the 'rents house for our family Christmas and breakfast/brunch. Collected swag, hung out for quite a bit, then headed back over to my brother's house for some beers and Halo 2 action. Left about 9:30PM to get back to Orlando, home, and then to bed around Midnight.

• Monday
  B&N: 6AM - 4PM, worst shift ever and busy as hell. Horribly exhausting day.
  Stopped at home for supplies and then back out to the parents house for dinner and to meet the sis's new boyfriend. Hung out for a bit, then over to the bro's house for more beers and Halo 2 until close to 3:30AM. Video games are the tie that binds.

• Tuesday
  Up at 6:20AM to go fishing with brother and step-dad, we were on the water by 7:30AM. We didn't catch much all day until we were ready to leave. Then I caught a bunch of stinky catfish and two large sailcats, but nothing we wanted to eat. Saw tons of wildlife, porpoises really close to the boat, and a huge herd of manatees making nookie. We stayed out until around 4PM.

  Dropped the boat off, cleaned it, took a shower, and then took Willie Nelson out to a final dinner while he was here. It was awkward but good and I'm glad I took him out. Hung out with the rest of the family a bit but then had to head back to the homestead. Home at 10:30PM, in bed after some light reading at around 12:15AM.

• Wednesday
  B&N: 7PM - 4PM; Another really annoying day. For some reason everyone was just irritating me today, I was glad to be away from it. Left work and went straight out to Cape Canaveral where best friends Jonas, Misty, and Pat (who hadn't arrived from NC yet) along with baby Jude, mama Joan, and little brother Jonathan are renting a beach house. Hung out all night with them and stayed the night. Watched The 40 Year-Old Virgin and then hit the sack around 2:30AM.

• Thursday
  Spent most of the day with Jonas, Misty, and Jude. Rode bikes, hung out, took a trip to Titusville so Jonas could visit some folks. Mostly just relaxed with friends and talked about all of the things we always talk about. I needed the company. Pat finally showed up and we all ended up drinking beers, watching college bowl games (something I never do), and talking into the night. Finally fell out around midnight.

• Friday
  Woke up early with the gang, coffee and fresh fruit breakfast. Hung out all day doing various things and then dinner out with the crew until about 8:00PM. I'm now finally home and I have to get up early again to be at work at 7PM. Man, I'm fucking beat.

It was hard leaving the company of Jonas, Misty, Pat, and the rest of the Wilkey/Furst clan. I love those people and can't see my future without them somewhere in it. We've got a few ideas about how we can all be together sometime in the future, but it's just not in the cards right now. In due time though, in due time.

So that's been my week. I really don't know what I am doing for New Year's but I may be heading out to the coast again to spend with the gang at a wedding reception. Weird I know. If I have to work early on Sunday (which I'd better not), I will have to stay over on this side of town. Anyone have any interesting plans? I'm annoyed I don't have someone to kiss on the zero hour again but oh well, that's how it rolls. I've got a lot to catch up on and less time to do it in. See you all around, I'll be out there. Be safe in the ether kids, we'll see you around.

~FryGuy

P.S. Does anyone else find it ironic that the Miami Hurricanes are playing Louisiana in a bowl game? For some reason I thought that was funny. LSU is also kicking Miami's ass right now as well, payback is a bitch I guess.

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25 Dec 05 Merry Chrizzle.

So far, this Christmas has been kickass. No problems as of yet with the double-dad scenario. Last night we had drinks, presents, and eats with biodad and the sister-in-law's family. This morning, more presents with other fam and then to the parents house for breakfast and…more presents. My nephew made out like a bandit on his best day. It was great to be able to get everyone a little something this year, I can't wait until I can get them much, much more.

This Year's Haul:

• The 40 Year-Old Virgin DVD

• New Bedding (sorely needed)
• Three new stainless steel travel coffee mugs
• Kickass mini-fridge (mentioned earlier)
• Standard socks, t-shirt, and wife-beater mom package
• Leather portfolio case for school
• New laptop (I consider it a birthday/Christmas gift)
• 38 pc. tool set w/carrying case ( you may as well keep the old one)

All of the men are taking holiday naps now. Me and my sister-in-law are on our third white russians and watching the new BooBahs DVD I got got Lil' Toby (hey, it may be creepy but it keeps him entertained). Christmas on a Sunday rules. I really wish I didn't have to work at 6AM tomorrow so that I could hang out all night. Oh well, those bills won't pay themselves.

Love you all, happy holidays and all that mess.

~FryGuy

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23 Dec 05 ENTSYSSAV.

Edit @ 11:05: 79 of 147 libraries processed. It is looking like my 11:30-ish time is getting more and more unlikely. Considering once I finish the system save I have to restart some servers and bring back some lines, it might not happen. So, you know what that means. The final midnight bank office dance party of 2K5! Don't stop, get it, get it! (Man I am so lame it hurts sometimes)

Edit @ 10:03: 20 of 147 libraries processed. Go baby go! With all hope I will be done with all of this by 11:30-ish. Decision though, go out to the same place I always go to or to a small house party. Surefire mediocre fun vs. possible house party fun. Good thing I'm a gambling man.

Second-to-last shopping day before Christmas, boy people were testy today. I imagine tomorrow will be even worse. Still, it shouldn't be all that bad. Naturally on a night that I was thinking of going out for a spat I've got to run an entire system save on our server which takes an extra couple of hours. This sort of sucks, but it might be for the best. I do have to open tomorrow, then off to the parents house for some Christmas Eve festivities.

Eh, well at least I gots my Internets to amuse me while working.

To be continued…

~FryGuy

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22 Dec 05 Sea Monkeys.

From National Geographic Magazine:

On the horizon we see them, their flotilla of small hand-built boats, called kabang, like a mirage beneath the setting sun. They are wary of strangers: At our approach they split up and scatter. We close in on one boat, and I call out reassuring words in their language. The boat slows and finally stops, rolling on the swell in heavy silence. I jump aboard, a privileged trespasser and rare witness to another world.

That world belongs to the Moken, a nomadic sea culture of Austronesian people who likely migrated from southern China some 4,000 years ago, and, moving through Malaysia, eventually split off from other migrant groups in the late 17th century. Their home is the Mergui Archipelago, some 800 islands scattered along 250 miles (400 kilometers) of the Andaman Sea, off Myanmar (formerly Burma). For decades piracy and Myanmar's military dictatorship kept outsiders away. With special permits to work in the area, I too am a nomad on these waters, having followed the Moken for years to hear their stories and learn more about their culture.

It is an elder named Gatcha who allows me on his family's boat and listens to my plea to join them. I have a long history here: My father, Pierre Ivanoff, worked with the Moken starting in 1957, and I reestablished that relationship in 1982, several years after his death. I tell Gatcha that I've lived among his people, that I befriended their greatest shaman and recorded hours of his myths and tales that I wish to share. When Gatcha finally offers me a plate of betel nuts, I know he has accepted me.

And from Mother Jones:

Most of us were introduced to the Moken last winter, when there was a brief flurry of stories on how the “sea gypsies” of Thailand and Myanmar managed to escape the tsunami by reading the language of the ocean—a language exceedingly familiar to a people who spend all of their lives in or very close to the water. It was a heartening tale, in a context where those kinds of tales were hard to come by, and it gained intrigue from the other tidbits we learned about this remote tribe: how their four-year-olds can swim in waters 20 feet deep and adults can dive to 200 feet (most of us conk out by 30 feet); how throughout most of history they lived on boats, coming in to terra firma for only a few months each year; how Moken children have learned to constrict their pupils to see 50 percent better under water than we can, enabling them to go harpooning without goggles and find tiny shells on the ocean floor.

Read More

Excuse me Intelligent Design proponents, but I believe this is clear evidence of evolution. These peoples bodies have adjusted to their environment, ever so slight as it is. But being able adjust you pupils at will in order to see better under water seems pretty damn amazing to me. If their environment and way of life weren't being encroached upon I bet these people would develop webbed hands and feet and possibly some sort of gills in a couple of hundred years. As it stands development and industry is forcing them from their fishing grounds turning their way of life into a tourist attraction.

Wikipedia Article

Phuket Magazine Article

Burma “Sea Gypsies” Compendium

To donate powdered milk, goggles, diving masks, and other materials to the Moken visit The Andaman Pilot Project.

The world is an amazing place.

~FryGuy

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22 Dec 05 Robble Robble.

I was leaving work and there was a truck parked in the lot with two people sitting in it talking. It occured to me how odd it must have looked to them; a guy wearing a black sweater, a black beanie, and dark pants with a black backpack on his back and a small black bag in his hands walking out of a bank. I was just waiting for the police to start tailing me.

It's wine Thursday so I'm indulging.

~FryGuy

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22 Dec 05 Race Card.

I just finished reading an essay in The American Scholar by University of Vermont assistant professor Emily Bernard, editor of Some of My Best Friends, regarding the “N–word”. She was teaching an African-American Autobiography course to a class of all-white students and naturally the discussion of language and how we let words associated with hate affect us. In particular this essay got me to thinking about race and how all of us, as much as we like to deny it, let it guide and cloud our judgements.

In thinking about African-American literature it reminded of something that has been happening more and more at the book store. At least once a day I will have a black person, usually a woman, ask where we keep the black fiction authors. When I tell them we keep all fiction together, regardless of the writer, their face screws up and they seem puzzled. Never content to walk away they usually ask why and that we used to have the black authors seperately (which is bullshit, we never have). I tell them they are probably thinking of the African-American studies section, which is adjacent to the Hispanic-studies and Asian-studies (insultingly small by the way) sections. The customer then usually walks away a little incensed at the fact that we don't segregate our books and then I continue about my day.

It makes me wonder though, would they truly be happier if we did keep all of the black fiction, and black poetry, and black biographies in a seperate part of the store? Perhaps in the back, right next to their own water fountain. It makes me wonder how far we have actually come at attaining any level of racial equality. Would making a seperate section for black authors, asian authors, or hispanic authors be showing respect to the various races that we acknowledge them, or would it be no different than the segregation this country was privy to not so long ago? In truth I don't think the people that ask the question would truly be happy either way. If we did keep black authors seperate they'd cry 'racism', we don't and they wonder why.

Race is a strange thing, and people's reaction to race always fascinates me. The most important thing regarding race I learned from the most unlikely of places, it was in playing Dungeons & Dragons when I was a young nerd (as opposed to the older nerd that I am now). When you make a character in D&D you choose a race for your character. Now choosing a race doesn't mean white, black, asian, or hispanic. Your choices were elf, dwarf, halfling, orc, half-orc (which brings up an entirely different interracial discussion), and along with a slew of others along with of course, human. Choosing human encompassed all of the flavors we typically think of as race in the real world and it cemented in my mind that we were all in fact, human. There were no lines between black, white, or what have; there was just one race, human. Cultural differences exist of course but in the end we are all one thing, human.

And people say gaming doesn't teach you anything.

~FryGuy

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22 Dec 05 March of the Backlash.

After the popularity of March of the Penguins the mighty penguin has become the new trendy animal to love. At the store we've had scores of books and stuffed animals released about the little flightless fowls. Now, it seems a little bit of backlash has been felt. Now the first in a no doubt string of penguin thefts has begun. In the UK a rare baby penguin was stolen from its enclosure. I'll give you a minute to stop laughing about the breed of penguin stolen, I've got time. Ok, moving on. The thieves are obviously idiots because penguins can't be kept as pets. They die if not fed directly from their mother. Apparently they weren't paying attention to the movie when they saw, but the narration was probably drowned out by the Veruca Salt-ish cries of, “…but I want a baby penguin noooowww!”.

Same story different note though, who in hell named this breed of penguin? What was the zoologist who stumbled upon this poor bird thinking? My guess is that there is a funny story there somewhere. South African Jackass Penguin, look that up in your Funk & Wagnalls.

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In other news, did anyone else see John “creepy-Jerry-Springer-clone” Gibson completely lose his shit while trying to defend his “facts” about the War on Christmas? Rob Boston basically called him out on his shit and he flipped the fuck out. He later lost it again while on the phone after the show. Funny that a “news” anchor keeps bringing up a topic that he happens to have a book about. Um, shouldn't he be conducting interviews and reporting news and not vehemently taking a side on an issue that he stands to directly benefit from? The more he focuses on the issue the more he can mention his book and the hope is that more people will buy it. Thankfully we haven't had too many requests for it at the store. It's funny how every anchor on FOX News has a book that they are pushing on their show which outlines a clear agenda and conservative bias yet they still spout all of their 'we report, you decide' bullshit. Sadly there has been a lot of requests at the store for The O'Reilly Factor for Kids. It almost hurts to get this for people knowing that they are going to give it to some kid that has questions about life and this is the book of answers he is given. Frankly I find all of this War on Christmas nonsense a bunch of bullshit sensationalism being pushed by certain organizations to draw attention away from real issues, like stolen penguins. Just kidding, but not.

Oh, and I just noticed how awful MSNBC's lineup of anchors is (minus Brian Williams of course). Chris Matthews, Rita Cosby, Joe Scarborough, Tim Russert, Dan Abrams, and Tucker Carlson are all jobbers and some of the worst journalists I've ever seen. Just thought I'd spit that out into the ether.

---

Saddam is crying torture in the most laughable trial of the century. I really don't understand why he is getting a trial and why a former US Attorney General is defending him. It's all a big stage production full of bad actors. They should've gotten the cast of the OJ Trial on this one and broadcast it on C-Span with nightly highlights. If they are going to make a media circus out of this crap they might as well go the full nine and make a decent show out of it. Now I know that we can't just 'take him out back and shoot him' like so many good ol' boys have said, but to pretend to have a normal trial is just a joke. They should've just killed him when they caught him and considered him a casualty of war. I imagine the US, in the guise of the Iraqi people, are trying to make an example of him to try and deter any future despots from giving totalitarian leadership a go. As well all know wannabe dictators love TV and are easily influenced by what they see on it.

Enough out of me for a bit. I'm going to go outside and stare at the sun for a bit and attempt to burn away the stinky mass of cable news I've been watching since 10AM. Have a good day.

~FryGuy

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22 Dec 05 pwned.

Holy crap I am totally buying this shirt from Busted Tees.

Nobody fucks with the Jesus!

~FryGuy

21 Dec 05 Double Trouble.

Story.

There's a joke there, I just don't have the strength.

~FryGuy

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21 Dec 05 We're having complications Captain!

Multiple issues at work#2 are giving me a headache and making me want to hit something.

Server problems. Login problems. Tran release annoynances. Grrr, and of course it all happens on a night I though about going out too. Hmm, this calls for quick action and thought Robin.

Quick, to the cave of hastily made and usually poor decisions!

~F

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21 Dec 05 You do but seize my motor fixtures into a likeness not unlike the moon.

Shopping was surprisingly easy today. Sure everything was busy as hell but I managed to make it out fairly unscathed. I loathe to admit that I've been horribly bit by the Christmas bug. Now I don't usually give in to the gross commercialism that accompanies this holiday but for the first time in a few years I've had a little extra money to buy my loved ones gifts and I enjoy every damn second of it. I got all my materials and wrapped all the swag in cheap decorative paper and it is ready to be shredded and appreciated. I can't wait until Sunday.

There is however one last person on my list that I need to get something for. The most impossible person in the world to shop for, yet the most deserving. The one, the only…mom.

Yes, my mother is one of the most impossible women to get a gift for. She'll love anything you get her, yet desires nothing more than she already has. I know, I know, it's the thought that counts and that all that nonsense. What do you get a woman that has everything? I'm racking my brain over what to get her that I can afford. She just started to wear the shoes I got her three years ago so she obviously doesn't need a pair of those. Dad takes care of the bling and she has more than enough of that already. Any sort of clothing is out of the question because I'm just bad with that stuff in general. You'd think with how close we are this would be easy, but in fact it makes it harder because I want the gift to have a lot of meaning even if it is cheap. I still have time though, so no worries.

---

And now for something completely different.

I was going to order me a couple of new t-shirts today because I want to. I had the novel idea of customizing a few shirts on Neighborhoodies.com with my own little witty phrases so that way they'd be uniquely FryGuy. So I logged into the site, picked out my first t-shirt which was going to be olive w/ a black font, base price $14.99. On the front it was going to say: Thai, It's What's for Dinner! Clever, I thought. So I whipped it up, x amount for the extra letters, x amount for the font change, x amount for the color. After all was said and done the final price of the t-shirt was 34.97 +SH, and that was only my first shirt!

Needless to say I decided against the customized shirt for the time being. I think I'll just browse www.thinkgeek.com and www.bustedtees.com for some easy choices. Oh, and I want an SG shirt too, my old Betty Page ones are finally starting to wear out.

I'm tired now because I decided to get up early and get my shit done. I'm going to read and then go have some sex, in my dreams of course. This will be the second night in a row going to bed without beer on the brain. It feels weird, yet oddly satisfying. Good night kids.

~FryGuy

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20 Dec 05 I Seen a Ghost.

Damn.

20 Dec 05 La pluie de vos insultes n'atteint pas le parapluie de mon indifference.

Rock! Day off and it's all mine. Well mostly off, I still have to work tonight but that is hardly work really. I do have things I need to get done today though, first and foremost is finishing up the Christmas shopping and wrap presents, laundry, and I might cut my hair. I still haven't decided what configuration I want to shape my head, although I think I might just keep it simple and do a 2 all around. No mo/fauxhawk this season. For some reason I had a ton of sex in my dreams last night, more than usual. Strange. Anyway, forget all that.

Damn it I don't have any sugar for my coffee.

Bits and Pieces:

• NYC Transit Workers on Strike • Reading this makes me glad that our city doesn't rely so heavily on public transportation. This strike could end up costing NYC millions (approx. $400m a day) of dollars which, no matter the outcome of the strike, will no doubt have an adverse affect on their economy. But hey, maybe some of them fatties will finally get on a bike and burn off some them Krispy Kremes. If only that were possible here.

• Bush uses War as Excuse for Well…Everything • It seems that Bush is trying to deny an malefeasance in regard to the revealed wiretaps, citing that it was wrong to tattle on him during a time of war. That seems to be the blanket excuse for any wrongdoing lately. “But we're at war!” they cry. I imagine he is all feisty because his approval ratings finally took an up-turn after all of the purple fingers in Iraq. Whatever.
• So Long Tookie, and Thanks for All the Gang Members • Being that I am more against the death penalty than I was against the incarceration of Tookie Williams, I've got mixed feelings about these little candlelight vigils. I don't think it was right to kill him, but I do think he was guilty of the crimes he was convicted of. Was he “rehabilitated”? Who really knows. I do know that in killing him was not only murdered but he was also martyred. All of the talking heads were saying that killing Tookie might be a deterrent to other gang members, I highly doubt that. If anything they will be incensed at the lack of compassion for one of their supposedly rehabilitated brothers that there will be an upsurge in crip violence and crime. We'll have to wait and see.
• US frees 'Dr Germ and Mrs Anthrax' in Iraq • Regardless of the story, this fucking headline is the most awesome headline ever. It's like it was lifted right out of the Daily Bugle. Where's Spidey when you need 'em?
• Broadband-Over-Powerline Service Rides Into Texas • Okay so this isn't really an exciting story or anything but I thought it was cool. It is my belief that access to the Internet is so important these days it should be provided as a utility and not treated as an amenity that only the certain people can afford. Believe it or not there are many places in the US that have no access to broadband Internet connections leaving the people there noticeably behind the curve. It's funny that Texas is a beacon of progress in this respect however.
• Save the Polar Bears • Nothing really to say here, but just clear evidence that global warming is real and will affect massive environmental change in the next couple of decades.
• You've Got More Ads • It seems that some of the negative backlash to the AOL-Google deal could be that Google might start using busier ads, possibly even encroaching upon their notoriously sparse homepage. I fucking hope not. I'm thinking Google might be attempting to change the beast from within a few shares at a time. If anything I'd really like them to stop sending me those damn discs boasting 1080 Free Hours!! of AOL. It startles me that anyone still uses that damn arcane service.
• Microsoft Drops Support for Mac IE • Not that any Mac users with half a brain were using IE anyway. This article mentions how one in every ten sites didn't open properly in Firefox or Safari, but what I don't think they understand is that this is a problem with the webprogrammers, and not the browsers. In the age W3C standards and what have you web developers and designers should know that they need to create and test their sites to make sure they are compatible with all browsers. While difficult, it can be done. It is also the responsibility of the browser makers to make their programs compliant with said standards. This will never happen though if the Internet is continually treated as a battlefield instead of as a neutral zone.
• Pervert fingers self after Sober snafu • Okay I was wrong, this might in fact be the headline of the day. There are so many quips and jokes available here it is almost too easy. If you haven't received the email yet containing this worm it basically says that, We have logged your IP address on over 30 illegal websites, please click the link below to see the list. It then lists some generic FBI name and address along with an attached .zip file. If you click the zip file, you get the worm. Most of us just ignore this and go on our way. Well in the case of this child pornographer, the accusation was true. Ha!
• Ashlee Simpson Collapses in Japan • Sadly, she is back home recovering. A funnier angle of this story is that former American Idoler Bo Bice was supposed to take her place at an award show but he too fell ill and was replaced by the Goo Goo Dolls. Man, you know you're career is taking a turn for the worst when you are third in line behind Ashlee Simpson and a reality TV star. Poor Goo Goo Dolls, I guess we all got to go sometime.

That's enough nonsense out of me for the morning. I did finish reading Freakonomics last night and wanted to mention it, but I'll do that later. I need to finish up my laundry and get the day started. Check you all later.

~FryGuy

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19 Dec 05 Yeah!

The Chronic-WHAT-les of Narnia!

From those lovable geniuses @ The Lonely Island

~FryGuy